Tuesday, April 3, 2012

My Struggle to Believe

I just finished my quiet time with the Lord. I pulled out my journal and began to write to Him that I was struggling to spend time with Him. Not sure why though....as I wrote it came to the surface that I am struggling to believe. I'm struggling to believe that He will get us to Peoria.

Our lives are full of so many unknowns right now which I do not do well with. I begged him for something even just something small to help me feel more peaceful. Then I questioned if I was like the Israelites begging for a king. If you are familiar with the story, God granted their grumbling compliant and they ended up with King Saul who was evil to the core. I don't want to end up like the Israelites. I want good things from the Lord that come in His timing.

I found myself praying the prayer of a man in the New Testament, "Lord, I believe, help me in my unbelief." He has come through every single time for our family. Yet, I struggle to believe because I am human and this is my sinful human condition. I don't want to stay in that condition. I want to be more. I want to be filled with faith. I want to be like Christ!

When we moved to Marshfield, my mom gave me a necklace that has a dove on it. The back of the necklace is inscribed with this "Faith guides us and gives us peace" I have had that necklace on for the past couple of weeks because it reminds me to trust Him. To hold onto His promises. I will most likely be wearing this necklace for a long time :)

Pray with me that He will help me in my unbelief.

1 comment:

  1. Uncertainty is so hard. God is the same, but as our circumstances change, it can be really tough to rest in His timing and promises. I pray that as you are tempted to worry, that you would cast all of your cares upon Him, because He cares for you. Love ya, my friend. Wendy

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